Shady thoughts of a Shady man

One more step, one more mile

2011-12-06T18:11:00.000+05:30

One more step, one more mile,

Oceans of tears, forests of smile,

O life, what have you been,

To know you, have been so keen,

Grief, laughter, zest and pride,

Oh what a thrilling ride,

Fist cuffs or just smiles,

Kind words and words of bile,

I have seen it all in life aisle.

One more step, One more mile.

you and me

2011-04-22T12:28:00.000+05:30

I know it is difficult to write ,

when thoughts are all you have ,

What will you give to thee ?

when memories makes the shades of blue

what smile can that be ,

You resonate my life , with silent vibes

you make me do right with simple chides ,

you smile at me and cry for me

you lift me up , when i am on my knee

How can i repay , the debt i am in

all the losses that turned into win

Can i sum it up in few lines

what grows so long like banyan vines

you and me , me and you

just like this forever too

Zindagi

2011-03-03T16:34:00.000+05:30

रुक रुक के ध्क्के से चलती है जिंदगी

मिट्टी मैं फँसे च्कके सी चलती है ज़िंदगी

जितनी हो जल्दी , उतनी ही फिसलती है ज़िंदगी

धूप मैं सफेद , अधपके बालों सी ज़िंदगी ,

जाते हुए सावन के पतझड़ सी जिंदगी,

इतना सब होते हुए कोई गुम नही ,

तेरी वजह से जन्नत है जिंदगी.

Bag it today bagged me - buy online and suffer

2011-01-27T11:45:00.000+05:30

Online shopping is said to be a boon for use net savvy people , it offer you peace of mind and easy way to access stuff that you would not move your butt to get , throw in some discounts and whoaa its the right buy . Is this too good to be true well if you want to have a bad experience , kindly visit bagittoday.com its a classic case of "how not to sell stuff online"

I am listing a chronology of events and then will analyze it .

1. Order Placed on 16-11-2010 /payment done instantly Delivery promised 2-3 weeks

2. Product Delivered on 22nd Dec 2010 (that’s more that 3 weeks ) Product delivered was not what I ordered – so I wont count that as

3. Complaint done on 24th Dec. 2010 and was promised a pick up and Money refund in 10 days

4. its 27th January 2011 at least 40 calls ( some how the seniors never come on phone very busy I guess ? )

The Ordeal starts .

I mail then endlessly and they choose to reply some of them with same information product has been delivered they even sent me a snap shot of courier tracking site , very helpful ? hardly ! if the support staff would have read the mail they would have known that I am talking of product replacement and not product delivery , but why read the mail when you can piss someone off by sending just the template .

The Mail exchange is hilarious and so are the telephonic conversations I pity the poor executives they promise , A pick up ( hey they even sent me a mail for it ) and then nothing gets done .

I keep on forwarding and re forwarding the mails to support (or lack of it ) and customer ( We don't) care mail id.

I have given up on getting a refund or product replacement but I have decided to call them and mail them once in a while to keep my self in good humor and get my negative emotions out ( sorry support guys and gals ) .

There is a noble intention to it , I just want to find out till how long bag it today can promise and break it . may be I can get a award for getting scammed online.

P.S :- will update soon

Jindagi

2011-01-04T19:22:00.002+05:30

जिंदगी बस यू ही , मुस्कराती है
जब भी मैं रोता हू आईना दिखती है
जब भी चलती है कोई पुरवई
घूर के ढेर से हो कर ही क्यों आती है

Again

2010-11-28T13:58:00.000+05:30

Discovered after ages, Like Old book with new pages,

Feeling of de ja vu , Yet things I never knew ,

Wish to know them better, Reading para and letter,

I want it for keep sake ,Yet I know it won’t be safe,

Since it can’t be my bible, I Shall return as liable

The Page

2010-07-27T08:25:00.003+05:30

As I tear the page away, it doesn’t make any sound for it was old, pale and crumpled just like my past that I wanted to tear away from me. I brush the corners that are teething from the side of the book, you can tear it but you can’t remove the traces. I looked at it the dim light was making it look like a scroll from some ancient time or was it really a scroll from ancient time. I read through it, it reminded me of the happiness I had in little things, when a walk could cheer you up, when rain will drench your heart and not just the body, when air will fill your mind with freshness. Yet I wanted to be away from it for it reminded me of what I did not have but was it really true? I didn’t have what I wanted now, but I had what I wanted at that time, so life is a trade off? You get what you want and you trade your future or you’re past. Who can tell me that a happy past is better that a happy future for future is uncertain and you are in all just a probability not likely to make it.

Shall I burn it, Or preserve
Memories that gives me Verve
Happy or sad, what shall I be?
Loathe and love is same for me

I carefully fold it , out it back in the book . This call will have to be taken some day but as for now let the memories rest as memories, just like that yellow page forgotten and maybe someday forgiven.

The Said and the (Unsaid)

2010-04-07T12:01:00.001+05:30

The Said and the (Unsaid)
The phone rings

A : what the F*** a call at this hour
He picks up and says Hello
B : hello A

A . Yes ( yeah you call on my number and whom do you expect to pick up the phone manmohan singh or what ? )
B: Hi A remember me I am old friend of yours.

A . hmmmmmmm ( what the F*** you call me early morning and ask me who you are I do not know are ? ) sorry cant remember. .
B: Come on man you cant forget me.

A: no I just got up ( shit man tell me )
B : Its Me B .

A. Hey man nice to hear from you ( oh F***** you stole my GF ) where are you now A days .
B: I am in town will you be able to meet me today.

A. Lemme see , I am busy today but maybe gimme your number and I will call back ( sucker I don't wanna see your face you married my gf and now you are here showing me your fat arse )
B : She was saying that if we can meet at lunch .cos we have an evening flight to catch .

A . Wait .......... ( oh shit she is with her and I almost said no to him , idiot he should have told me he is with her ) . Oh I thought you are here for couple of days . ok where do we meet ? lets meet at TGIF VV .
B. No , I am at my in-laws so we meet there only as it would be hectic for us to get back and then catch the flight .

A. Ok ok we will meet at your in-laws ( now will you make me talk to her or you will do all the talking )
B. You know na , the place I think you have been here take the address (.........................)

A. Yeah I think I have been there once ( ha , what do ya know you smelly fart , I know that house by my heart.)
B. Right man , I have to call X , y and Z maybe they can make it for lunch .

A. sure man catch ya at lunch ( seems I will have to directly ask ) where is she ?
B. oh yeah she is around just wait .

A Waiting ( sigh I have waited so long what is few more minutes )
She : hello

A . Hi ( oooooooo she still has that damn sexy voice )
She : so how are you ?

A. Fine ( oh baby without you how can it be good ) how are you ?
She:. Nice to know that , even I am fine . I hope you will be able to make it for lunch .

A : yes I will be there ( damn why will i not be there when you are calling me my dear )
She : then see ya ,

A .: bye ( ooooooooooooo don't just keep )

A well I have half a day to get ready and get dressed in my best cloths . lemme catch a nap and then get ready to meet the love of my life .......

LOST

2010-04-06T11:42:00.000+05:30

Lost
Somewhere between the job and the home
Somewhere between the boss and subordinates
Somewhere between friends and family
Somewhere between my thoughts and my blogs
I lost what I was , I lost what I was to be , I lost myself

Somewhere in the worlds of dream , somewhere in the land of the awake
Somewhere in the words that were said , somewhere in the words that were not said
Somewhere in the deep dark eyes, somewhere in the touch of divine
Somewhere in the pain and the laughter I lost my myself
I lost my senses , I lost myself.
Am created by what I loose and I gain every time I give ( by choice or lack of it )

The Bookseller

2010-04-02T14:44:00.001+05:30

The Bookseller
Thin graying beard , Glasses on the eyes , a pencil in his hand , he is sitting in the open ground of Nehru place. His hands are moving fast and giving birth to a face , seems he is doing a portrait and no he doesn't need a photograph in front of him to do it . the pencil is graying the areas , the shade getting darker with every stroke. He stops and drags on his Wills and smiles with satisfaction , I am still wondering if the satisfaction is from the fact that the portrait is going as he expected it or from the fact that he enjoys his smoke. There are People around him who are rummaging through his second hand books and he is sitting there in a chair but still not there.
Ah my favorite book seller , the process of buying books itself is interesting here . His command of English language , his philosophy and his knowledge of books. You can ask him to suggest few books and he will do so immediately but before that he would surely ask what is that you are looking for, Medieval romance , fiction , science fiction , Love stories , Mills and boon , Philosophy, he has his opinion on every subject and every book .
We exchange the pleasantries, as I start to rummage through the books. Someone is looking for French books as the person is learning the French , My bookseller asks him what's his hobby beyond learning French and the guys replies its cars , My bookseller promptly tells him to look for French books on car as this would make sure he learns French and enjoys reading the books.
I buy my stock and compliments him that he is the best bookseller I have ever met and he philosophically states that he hates being called a bookseller because now a days , A shoe seller only looks at your shoes and a shirt seller only at your shirt and an umbrella seller only at your umbrella ( or lack of it) no one looks at the person as a person . Where as he is there just helping you in selecting books and that to only if you ask and he listens.
We chat for long on many things , on his love for human faces and how he can draw them from memory . as he says we all are similar just alike only a slight difference makes us look so different. He tells me about his new passion i.e. he is learning to play piano , he always believed that It would be tough to play it and now that he is learning it he is realizing that he wasted 20 years of his life by not attempting to learn piano because he perceived it to be tough.
We say bye , and I depart with my books and my lesson for the day .

2009-04-20T12:10:00.002+05:30

Journy

Dafan Kar do ya jala do Mujhe,
Mitti hoon Mitti main mila do Mujhe
Swarg aur Narak yahin paa chukka
Ab kahahn jaoonga ye bata do mujhe
Paap aur Punya ke mere sabhi hisaab
Ch-nd sikke chadha ne se poore huye
Na laya tha kuch , na le jaoon ga
Par maloom nahi Ab kahaan jaoon ga
Gar Himmat hai to mere saath chal
Rassate hai naye , manzilian lapata
Safar Mushkil ya aasaan ye mallom nahi
Saath tum jo chalo to sab paa jaoon ga.

सफ़र
दफ़न कर दो या जला दो मुझे,
मिट्टी हूँ मिट्टी में मिला दो मुझे
स्वर्ग और नरक यहीं पा चुका
अब कहाँ जाऊँगा ये बता दो मुझे
पाप और पुण्या के मेरे सभी हिसाब
चंद सिक्के चढ़ा ने से पुर हुए
ना लाया था कुछ , ना ले जाऊं गा
पर मालूम नही अब कहाँ जाऊं गा
गर हिम्मत है तो मेरे साथ चल
रास्तेहै नये , मंजिले लापता
सफ़र मुश्किल या आसान ये मालूम नही
साथ तुम जो चलो तो सब पा जाऊं गा.

deja vu

2008-06-30T17:04:00.000+05:30

deja vu
I have lived before and I have died too,
I have laughed before and I have cried too,
I have loved before and hated too,
But when it comes to you
Oh there is no deja vu

I lost my life , you lost your love

2008-06-02T10:42:00.004+05:30

I lost my life , you lost your love
I waited, for my love for you was true
I was sure that you would see me thru

I knew you will be on my side
We promised a life long pride

What we had for each other
Was undone by your brother

Oh it took you so long to come to my grave
When you did come, it was not for my save

Now I do not want to know more
Blood is thicker than water for sure.

______________________

Origanlly wrote it when the Nitish Katra Trial was in progress now the judgement revived some of the old memories

As Nun would have it

2008-01-19T14:05:00.000+05:30

Advances failed
Lips remain dry
The hands could not touch her
For she would cry ( as in shout ;)

Sounds that made me crazy
Now remain hazy
The burning fire
The quest to acquire
My minds desire

Distance killed the passion
For becoming a “NUN” is in fashion

I

2007-06-25T13:56:00.000+05:30

I see beyond the words
And I miss the fine print,

I think of the future
And the present is cluttered

I sin in my thoughts
And my actions are pure

I love thy self
And hate them all

I see the scorching sun
And miss the dew drops

I hear what you say
And listen to my thoughts

I worry of future
And present no joy

Oh embrace me, take me
Take me as I am

For I am just a human.

For I am I

Am I not ?

Dusty Sunday

2007-06-08T11:03:00.000+05:30

The inevitable has happened. Yes it had to happen (because it was inevitable in the first place - silly me ) . I had avoided the eye contact and feigned death to avoid it but I failed and I had to clean my cupboard.
I tactically evaluated the situation like a general. of a small country who knew going to war will cost him his job and not going to war will cost him his job . (In this case it was a beautiful Sunday wasted on cleaning /fighting ).
Ah so nice of you to remind me that I had to clean , I was planning for it anyway . She was amazed at the response . She did not say anything poor women she was all ready for a fight and I robbed her of it.
I opened the first drawer , whiff of smoke , is it burning ? nah it was just the dust , oh Delhi is so dusty I consoled myself. few bills were stuffed in I looked at them ah the missing links to so many disconnections that keep happening. I decided to look at them later and stuffed them in a plastic bag. Some gunpowder shots, oh I still have them , ( my face grinned as now I have something to do in the night will try to blast few caps and see if they still worked . ) I took them out and put them in the sunlight as sap blasts that are dry make more sound.
Ah what is that looked like a toy pistol plastic one with 6mm BB bullets (cool) Air gun with metal .22 shots (Wow) I should clean more often . I took them out and placed them on the shelf I will play with the gun as soon as I dust everything out. Some pencils and papers which i stuffed in the plastic bag.
Now the runner I really like this one . there as aurbindo sharing space with Robert frost and Neeraj . Ludlum with Prem chand and Pai. I dusted the the books and started to read one of them. Short stories of SAKI. I heard a yell - I asked you to clean them not read them . Asked me. I proposed my self that I will do it . ( She wants war I thought as I dusted "its all quiet on western front" )
Another shelf and and buried between the books was a packet containing letters . Letters from my friends , I was amazed to see some of the names as I have no idea if they exist on planet earth . My first pen pal in Japan , My best friends letters , not so good friends , but yet letters and they carried information that seemed silly to me but in those days It was that information which was so important. Ok I will read them once again and I kept it carefully.
A smile played on my face when I saw that big blue book . I had almost forgotten that i had invented a language and the code was right in those pages and it was dutifully written for 2 years so it contained a lot of stuff which I could not understand , I will crack my own code some day and smiled looking at it.
She came back and yelled at me . you have created more mess than you have sorted out , What are these bags for she enquired , Oh I will look at them in in leisure time and what is this she pointed at the heap of books , Oh this I will take it back with me and read .
"Oh god" She said. I still wonder why she has to remember god every time she talks to me. Go and have your food your dad is waiting , Well you cant argue your mother when she is telling you to eat your food . So I left everything like that and headed towards dinning table . Wash your hands before you start eating. I looked at my dad and smiled and sat down to eat the food . She was cleaning the room I had just cleaned. hmmm the food is good and I will sleep and try to decode my blue book.